I am learning

... that God cares double for the person/s I care about.

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Is Tatay dead?

Why do you leave me with questions? Questions after questions after questions…. The asking is as un-filling as the answers, As though pouring water on a holed cauldron. How can I believe? And yet, how can I not believe? How can unhappy dreams and painful reality marry, Making the past never again to be retrieved? One night, that sharp razor came to slice my heart; It came the night next, and treaded the old wound’s path again. Am I to blame then should I choose not to lie down Lest I die, drowned in tears and searing pain? What a dark, dark path this is! Darker than the darkest of nights perhaps, Deeper than the deepest Mariana’s ocean…. How can I then stop asking, with sighs and gasps? Were I to plead for what-ifs and could-have-beens, The pain, the wound, still wouldn’t mend… Much less the thought of future hope, a mere flicker, A leap of faith to unknown’s end. How many more sighs? How many more tears? How many more groans of surrender Uttered b...
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Where is God’s love in the death of my father?

When I pleaded and bargained before Him for the recovery of Tatay in the ICU, where is God’s love in that un-granted plea? W hen I asked him why He took Tatay at such a surprising time, where is God’s love in His silence? When I asked Him to at least confirm to me the truth of the resurrection, where is God’s love in His pursed lips? Yet somehow, in the turn of events, and in the voice of the biblical heroes of faith, I am compelled to believe and declare that God’s love is weaved in through these moments; That when I feel extremely unheeded, some droplets of answers are slowly filling my heart, although unnoticeable at first. There are no answers, at least in the way I want them to; but these heroes of faith declare trust, NOT answers. They pleaded too. They cried too. They bargained too. But in the end, they yielded to the utter helplessness of reason before the ever-wise God. It was not that their pleas were un-granted. It was not that their cries were unheeded, Not even when thei...
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Man has end, God is unending

Isaiah 40:6-8 says, " All men are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field. The grass withers and the flowers fall, because the breath of the LORD blows on them. Surely the people are grass. The grass withers and the flowers fall, but the word of our God stands forever. " This passage strongly reminds us of the futility of man’s life, and the everlasting nature of God’s Word. And this should lead us to ask important questions, like how do we spend our lives everyday? What kind of things are we pursuing on? Are they things that would have impact in eternity? Let’s always bear in our minds and our hearts that our life is just very short. It may be later today, tomorrow, or who knows when, we will die. And so we should be sure whether we’re making the most of our lives here on earth, and in doing so, will it benefit us even in eternity. In the Christian perspective, we believe that Jesus Christ offers us this eternal life for every one of us, aft...
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