What to do when flu downs you?

(Reflections of a consistent patient)

So there I was inside my pink, floral blanket, curled up on my right side, trembling as if in cold though I was burning with high fever, and with the throbbing pain at the inner back portion of my skull as bonus.  I could feel it beating in sync with my pulse.  I thought my temples would burst any minute.  All my joints were also crying in pain, but I felt too weak to massage any of them.

 It was Tuesday, past three in the morning, and as soon as I was awakened by that excruciating headache, I was not getting back to sleep.  All my roommates are in their dreamland for sure.  I wished I was at home where I could just cry out “Tay!” with that agonizing voice, and then my father would just scramble to my side and touch my forehead and massage my elbows and knees which “magically” heals us (that’s what I thought as a child).  But I’m no longer at home, and my father has already passed away some three years back.  What do I do?  That question raced with that pulsating pain in my head as tears silently glided from my eyes.  The next second, I found myself saying, “Lord Jesus, have mercy on me.”

Prayer.  Amazing how answers come immediately when I wasn’t really expecting them.  But of course!  Did I actually think I was on my own? Well, apparently.  And that’s exactly what I’ve been doing before the flu arrested me.  I was all to myself, in a selfish, proud, sinful way, the most obvious manifestation of which is not having taken care of my body.  Not eating well.  “Di man gud ka magtarung ug pamahaw gud!”, as one friend pointed out, in a reprimanding way.  I guess I deserved that.  And I saw how fragile my body is, or human physical bodies in that matter.  That’s the answer to my silent prayer, “Lord, what are You teaching me in my situation right now?”

Care.  I needed care.  That admission came as a speeding bullet.  I felt a tinge of self-pity as soon as that thought came.  And I know how those tiny seeds grow fast.  So I suddenly became alert and cautious, and applied the immediate remedy I know.  I gave thanks.  No. I gave praises to God.  So, buried in my covers, still curled up like an unborn baby, I praised God for creating a masterpiece called human body, which automatically gives signals when something’s not working well.  And if you won’t pay attention, the body has to do it for you so that you’ll end up in bed lying and ready to get the help and care you need.  How amazing!  This is how God cares for His creation.  There’s a built-in alarm system that signals which part hurt, so that when my nurse-friend-housemate got my call for help, she knew which part in my head had to be massaged, as I told her so.  I needed care.  And oh, how God does care for me!

Family.  And that’s also how I ended up realizing I do desire to have a family of my own.  What if I get sick like this again in my old age and I’m so all alone?  But what a self-centered thought!  So I remedied it with, “well, how should it feel if I’m the one giving the care?”  And that settled me.  But then anyway, back to my present state, family came in different faces.  God graced me with housemates like Faith, a nurse by heart and profession, who gave me the tender, loving care every patient needs.  I choose to zip my lips for the rest of the care-giving she did for me, because I prayed that the Lord will just repay her kindness as He saw them done away from limelight.  I have a family after all!  It’s when you’re sick that you’ll be able to see how the people around you truly care for you.  Even from a distance, some friends still managed to check on me just to remind of my medicine schedule (sometimes, with reprimand attached, but I chose not to mind anymore).  And then of course, the assurance that I was being prayed for also came.  How sweeter can God be?

Love affair.  When my flu persisted to the second day, I decided to just divert my thoughts and talk to myself.  So I described what kind of pain I’m going through.  I counted my blessings.  I imagined my love story.  Oh yes, what a beautiful love story it was!  I even forgot I was sick because I was laughing with thrill all by myself the whole time.  I was married, and the groom didn’t know it yet! It was the most beautiful love affair I had, just the right kind of man, because it was God who gave me to him.  I wish to write about it in another setting, and I wish I can.  But after that, I didn’t mind being bedridden anymore.  I realized that with imagination, one can do a lot even when they’re sick.

Money. Don’t be sick if you don’t have money.  That’s all I can say.  But I had no money, and still I got sick, which brought me back to Prayer.  And reflections repeat.

P.S.:

Looking back, while still sniffing the remains of colds and sinusitis, I am still thankful and humbled.  I learned to ask God to help me have a better taste of my meals every time, even if I don’t like them at first.  I learned to receive grace in tangible ways.  I learned to appreciate the quality and character of people’s hearts, which usually lie covered by their appearances.  Most of all, I will practice what I learned.

In everything give thanks, eh? Indeed.